Bout of Doubt, Round 4,994,847

So, my wife comes home last week and sees the complete mess strewn around the desk here, books splayed open, spine up, pages marked, scribbles of three Word documents, four Bibles all opened to the same passage and umpteen hundred Web pages open in my browser. For a brief moment, I feel like she's looking at me as if I were Ted Kaczynski hammering away at some old typewriter.

Perhaps, she's right.

She laughs and shakes her head, and we head out to dinner. We talk about the stock market, databases and computer games instead of what's really on my mind; we both know I need a break from my quest to discover The Truth . . . dun, dun, dun.

I had an entire journal entry written up that talks about my current bout of doubt and how other people have reacted to it. Instead, I think I'll just show you where I'm trying to focus my mind. So, here's a short list of things I've been trying to meditate on:

But he must ask in faith without any doubting (wavering), for the one who doubts (wavers) is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. ~ James 1:6

The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. ~ II Corinthians 10:4,5. (This passage is very interesting in The Message as well)

Knowledge and doubt are inseparable to man. The sole alternative to 'knowledge-with-doubt' is no knowledge at all. Only God and certain madmen have no doubts. ~ Martin Luther

If ours is an examined faith, we should be unafraid to doubt. If doubt is eventually justified, we were believing what clearly was not worth believing. But if doubt is answered, our faith has grown stronger. It knows God more certainly and it can enjoy God more deeply. ~ C. S. Lewis

If I doubt, I exist. ~ St. Augustine

I believe; help my unbelief. ~ Mark 9:24

Anyone out there really suffer with doubt in their faith? How do you deal with it?